Golden Country Dragon

 It's always nice to get back into the kitchen after a nice vacation, Dungeon Meshi Maniacs!  I spent last week surrounded by dragons and survived to tell the tale.  Now, I know some slimes aren't intimidated by dragons but this one definitely is!  They are large, covered in scales and breath death.  Not to mention the plural of Dragon is War.  Seriously, the oversized lizards can't help but fight among themselves.  I'm surprised there are any left.  I'm even MORE surprised that we are eating dragon yet again this week!  Yes, it's a repeat ingredient but don't worry, I promise it won't be boring. With that drunken boast let's make some easy Golden Country Dragon.

How is the gang finding dragons all over the place?  We spent the first four entire chapters trying to eat one single red dragon, DMMs!  Now the dungeon seems lousy with dragons! If you can remember the start of the Thistle fight they summoned all the dragons to put an end to our hungry adventurers.  And pretty much succeeded!  Only Laois was left and even he needed some help to put Thistle down.  That help came from the most unlikely of places, a book.

Looks like Thistle can't read between the lions, DMMs!  Of course this isn't your run of a mill book lion. No, no no. Remember that goat that befriended Cap'n right until it ate pretty much all of Cap'n's desires?  Turns out that paper lion here is also a demon!  It's possible that this is the same demon but I'm not completely clear on that.  Needless to say it couldn't wait to chow down on some Thistle desire.

Unlike with Cap'n the lion didn't leave anything left for Thistle to desire.  The poor magician is just existing at this point.  Great for Buddhist, bad for anyone not following that path.  With Thistle neutralised all of their spells stopped.  Which, if you remember, included making the kitchen huge when the dragons were summoned.  The kitchen went back to normal and the dragons shrank to scale.

Senshi isn't going to just let food sit on the floor, DMMs!  He is a very economic dwarf.  So dragon is back on the menu, boys!  First step, drain all the blood and guts from the dragon.

Thankfully I live in a more cosmopolitan dungeon so I can access ingredients that already have those removed.  But this created a problem, DMMs.  Look at that image for the Golden Country Dragon.  That's a chicken. A baked chicken.  Which is something we already covered waaaaayyyy back when we were cooking Cockatrice.  I gotta admit, I almost skipped this week.  The lead up to the dish wasn't that involved and it's a dish we've already made!  I threw my hands up in the air not knowing what to do when my tv randomly turned to a show about a camping jerk and the hot woman who cooks for him for unknown reasons.

In the episode I watched the young lady not only cooked chicken but she cooked in a way I've never tried before.  She made Beer Chicken!  What's that?  Simple. You take a can of beer, open it, shove it into the chicken's empty cavity as the chicken is upright, cook until finished!  One of the easiest things you can do.  I'm not kidding, DMMs.  This may involve cooking a whole chicken but anyone can do it.  All you need is some beer, any will do!

That's from a local brewery but use whatever you like.  Before we get cooking what's interesting about Beer Chicken is it's another recipe we aren't sure the origin of.  I mean, it's shoving a beer can up a chicken and grilling.  Seems like something any redneck could have invented which means they weren't likely to write it down.  We do know it was a thing in the 1980's but the first written record comes from a newspaper in Houston.  A local barbeque pit builder created a pit for then President George Herbert Walker Bush and Beer Chicken is what they cooked.  So sure, maybe this is the only good thing a Bush has ever been associated with?  That said there are some detractors to this style of cooking.  The complaints are the beer never gets to a boiling point so you aren't fully infusing the chicken with the flavor.  To that I say that's, like, your opinion, man!  This is fun which is a big reason why we cook.  So, you have your beer and you want to shove it up a chicken.  What do you need next?  Chicken.

This is roughly a four pound chicken, DMMs, which is what I'd recommend you not go over.  You don't want to wait all day for the chicken to cook!  "Wait a minute, you forgetful fluid! How will you grill this chicken when you don't even own a grill?" I can hear you yell into a bag of charcoal.  Good memory, DMMs!  I famously don't own a grill.  So I won't be grilling this chicken, I will be roasting it.  Roasting chicken is simple, set the oven to 425 and cook until you hit an internal temperature of 165.  This is the temperature needed to kill any parasites or bacteria that may be lurking under the meat! Usually this takes an hour and twenty minutes.  While the oven is preheating you'll want to spice up your chicken.  Take three tablespoons of olive oil and just massage the heck out of that chicken!

Gross!  Wash those hands, DMMs. Because you need to mix your spices.  I went simple with my rub, paprika and five spice.

Feel free to be creative here, DMMs. You know what flavors you like!  Whatever spices you use you'll need a lot so go with at least a heft tablespoon of each.  I mixed the paprika and five spice with a little salt and a healthy amount of black pepper.  Just put them all into an easy to access container.

Once again massage this all over the chicken.  Leave no part untouched, DMMs!  Get up in under those legs and wings.  They paid for extra special attention so give it to them.  Keep going until it is coated in spice.

Trust me, it'll taste better than it looks.  Now for the fun part. OPEN that can of beer, DMMs.  Do not skip this part.  The can won't explode since you won't get it that hot but you also won't get any of the flavor if it's still sealed in the can.  Set the can upright in a pan or dish and force it up the chicken cavity.  Don't be gentle!  Make it fit!  Trust me, it'll go in.  Now make sure the chicken sits upright.  You don't want it falling over.  That won't be the end of the world but it's something you want to avoid simply because the beer will spill.

Okay, looking pretty stable.  Put in a meat thermometer since every oven is different you never know if your chicken will actually be done in an hour and twenty.  It could also be done early and you don't want dried out meat!  That defeats what we are trying to do here, DMMs!  I like to let my chicken reach 170 degrees rather than 165 because I like to live a little on the safe side.  Once you hit your prefered temperature take the chicken out and let it rest for 15 minutes.   It's worth the wait, trust me.

 Beautiful and so tender!  The beer I chose have a nice little twang to it which worked great with the spices.  Also, take a look in the pot.  This is why you have them sitting over something, DMMs!

That's some serious drippings!  You don't want that on the bottom of your oven.  And that's it!  Seriously, that's all it takes to roast Beer Chicken.  May seem a little backwoods but who cares?  This is a fun way to make excellent chicken.  Give it a try the next time you want a little something nice but don't want to lose your connection to the common slime!  And that's it for this week.  Sure, it's a shorter update than normal but look at how much food we've made!  There are leftovers for days.  So be sure to come back in seven days and we'll take a look at what makes the dragon super special.  See you then!