Rolled Harpy Egg Omelet

 I have a question for you, Dungeon Meshi Maniacs.  Can a recipe have ill intent?  That it exists to spite those that try to make it?  A recipe equivalent of a bully?  One that pushes you down at recess, takes your Game Boy and deletes your Pokemon save file but nobody will believe you because their parents are super rich?  The answer is YES!  Every cook has that one recipe that invites them to the fairgrounds but abandons them there twenty miles away from home.  This week we meet mine.  Join me, DMMs, as I face up to the worst son of a bitch on the planet.  A real scumbag, the Rolled Omelet!

Take a good look, DMMs. Rolled Omelet once told me that if your hand were bigger than your face it was proof that you were a loser.  Broke my nose with that prank.  While I'm hesitant to take my eyes off the thing for more than two seconds we do have to talk about how we get to this most evil of all recipes.  Remember last week when three separate groups all met in the dungeon?  Well, that has attacked some onlookers.

Harpys! I will admit that I always loved the harpy, DMMs.  Such a funny monster.  It's a giant bird with a woman's head and HATES you!  They exist to eat them some sailors.  Unfortunately for these harpys they are up against their natural predator; Ninja.

Brutal. Thankfully the harpys didn't come alone!  Nope, an old friend is back and is ready to rumble!

It's Falin, DMMs!  She's back and she is better than ever!  If you aren't familiar with what comes next I'd recommend that you steel yourself because it can be a bit overwhelming.

Wowsers, DMMs.  Is it hot in here or is it just her?  So much fanart has been made out of this awesomeness!  As much as I'd like to sit here and go on and on about how cool Chicken Falin is we must press on.  Needless to say this is all a huge fight that takes nearly a chapter and a half.  Despite what the editorial pages of the New York Times say, this is NOT a Dungeon Meshi review blog!  Nope, we are here to talk about recipes so we will skip that whole amazing fight and get to the cooking.

To celebrate not dying Laios decides to cook for the group.  Great!  Good guy loves to cook for his friends.  But he decides to make Rolled Omelet.

Not just any rolled omelet, DMMs. But one made of harpy egg!

*sigh* I guess it's time I come clean, DMMs.  I have horrible, bone chilling news! I'm a huge weeb.  If you haven't ran into heavy traffic to get away from my blog after such a bombshell I appreciate your dedication.  Being who I am I felt that I needed to learn all the great anime related recipes!  Onigiri, okonomiyaki, takoyaki?  I made them all.  Then came my Kryptonite.  The Rolled Omelet or by its real name Tamagoyaki.  You've been with me through all my successes and many cooking failures, DMMs but for some reason the rolled omelet failure angers me each time.  Like I said, this recipe exists to torment me but I keep coming back!  Why?  Because it looks so simple, DMMs!  I SHOULD be able to do this!  Here, let me walk you through things.  First we start with the only ingredients you need other than eggs.

Okay, normally it's soy sauce and mirin but as we've talked about in the past I prefer to use this soup stock instead of soy sauce.  You can also add dashi for a deeper flavor but let's stick to the easy stuff.  Take two eggs, add them along with a tablespoon of the soy sauce and a tablespoon of the mirin to a bowl and beat them up!

Here is where all of my past efforts fall apart.  You see, normally one would use a special square pan to cook the rolled omelet.  They aren't that expensive but I don't make this dish enough to warrant buying one.  So I have to use a round pan with makes the shape a little harder.  Also none of my pans are non-stick.  I don't like them nor really trust them.  So we have to rely on good old oil to grease the pan.  Here is the most fun part of the rolled omelet.  You use a paper towel to spread the oil around and put it to the side because you'll do it one more time during cooking.  Heat the oil on medium heat and spread.

"What's with the hands!?  You're supposed to be a slime!" I can hear you wail as if you're team lost a major championship.  What can I say?  I'm a slime of many talents.  Also you notice the photos are a bit better than normal.  That's because this dish comes together quickly so it's not a good idea to stop and take pictures while you cook.  I needed help from someone with far more artistic talent than myself.  Worries of presentation aside the next step is to add a fourth of the egg mixture to the greased pan.

I'm already getting tense, DMMs.  You'll roll this around and make a thing crepe-like film over the pan.

Here's where I screw up every single time, DMMs.  You have to fold this over like a burrito.  Fold the sides in and then roll the mixture down the line.  One quick tip, feel free to use your hands to nudge the egg mixture where you want it to go.  Yes, that is a hot pan but this will give you more control.  However, I have a problem.

Ugh, it's sticking again!  I've tried so many different oils over the years, DMMs, and the egg always sticks.  Just look at how it comes together when the egg sticks to the pan.

*sigh* Not great.  But we press on.  Take your oiled paper towel and "reoil" the pan.  Pour the remaining egg mixture into the pan.

You are going to repeat the process again but this time you will fold the first omelet over the mixture making the finished product.  I have to warn you, DMMs.  What I made isn't pretty.

There it is, DMMs.  I've seen this result more times than I can count.  It's still edible but you have to wonder why I didn't just make scrambled eggs.  But I realized something, DMMs.  I don't live in the Edo era.  Heck, I don't live in 1960's Tokyo.  I live in 2025 and have access to technology!  I have a cool ally in my corner who can help me stand up to this bully!  A friend...named PAM!

Where oil has failed me Pam should help me get the slick pan needed to get this dish right.  I'm also increasing the amount of eggs from two to three.  I think we need more liquid to help the omelet cook and keep shape.  We've already covered how to cook the omelet so why don't we just jump in and see the difference?

Look at that egg just lift off the pan!  Eat it, Rolled Omelet! Though soon I'll be the one eating it so maybe that wasn't the sickest burn?

Folds faster than Superman on laundry day!

Once I finished folding the first layer like a champ I sprayed some more Pam.  Sure I do miss how fun it was to rub oil with chopsticks and a soaked paper towel but this is working for me.  Why change it up now?

Second layer is looking pretty Peridotite.  Time to fold again with confidence!

No longer will I live in fear of the rolled omelet, DMMS!  I stood up to my bully and knocked it on it's butt right into a sandbar.  I walked away with my significant other in my arms and the words HERO OF THE BEACH shining over my head.  Just look at the difference Pam made!

Cut the ends off the good omelet and it's perfect.  Then just cut it into four or five pieces and you're done.  Take a look!

It may not look like much to you, DMMs, but this means a lot to me.  Decades of suffering are behind me!  I can finally work at making this a dish I look forward to doing.  I have to say I'm still not sure how this beats good old scrambled eggs.  I may mix some mirin and soy sauce into my next batch of scrambled and see for myself.  For the moment it's time to celebrate this egg dish the best way I know how. With a necessary addition!

Fantastic!  See you next week, DMMs!  I'm sure whatever we talk about it won't be as traumatic!